Friday, 1 June 2012

I Can't Resist Swearing




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I've been resisting a lot of things recently.  Do you ever get in that mood?  Where you dig your heels in? Stick your chin out and get as stubborn as you can possibly get without actually standing in the middle of the carpet and having a hissy fit? (Who am I kidding?  I love standing in the middle of my carpet and having a hissy fit.)

Well, I do.  And that's how I've been feeling lately.

When I was little, I can remember being really stubborn.  If I wanted to learn how to do something, I'd just keep at it till I'd done it.  My dad recently reminded me of something I did when I was about 6.  He had been out on the street with my sister for a while, teaching her how to ride her bike without stabilisers.  I decided to join them.  My sister was taking a break from her bike.  So I picked it up.  Got on it and rode off.  My dad said he could see my concentration as I peddled off up the street.  I had never ridden without stabilisers before, but was determined that I'd just keep going till I fell off.

That's kind of been my philosophy for life...

In Japan, they call this way of being the "ganbatte" way (pronounced "ganbattay").  Ganbatte, in Japanese, means something like try hard, keep fighting, do your best, have courage, (although there's no literal translation into English).  I think that's been my nature since I was little.  It's how I mastered pointe work during ballet lessons even though my feet bled, and how I travelled round the world alone, even though I was often filling my big girl pants (that's a technical term), how I achieved most of the wonderful and exciting things I have achieved in my life.

And sometimes when I'm trying to come over all zen, enjoy the small things in life, get in the "flow", feel peaceful...  I come over all agitated, stubborn and restless. Instead of feeling the "peace of the moment", I want to run round butt naked in a big floppy hat, shouting rude words, cavorting with a bottle of gin.  I can't help it.  Resisting the crap out of stuff makes me smile.

What's wrong with having a good old foot stamp every once in a while, at the same time inventing new swear words?  I love to swear.  I know it's not big or clever but it makes me laugh.  (A recent addition to my swearing thesaurus?  Funt.  I'll leave you to figure it out.)  I also love being sarcastic, making rude noises, and snorting when I laugh.

So, while I've been spending the past couple of weeks trying to get into a peaceful place so that I can get down to some art and write something here on my blog, I've been resisting being the sweary, uncouth, snorty, stubborn person I can also be.  And it just hasn't felt right. The more I've resisted swearing, the more I've come over all Gordon Ramsey...

And then I remembered...  What you resist persists.  So I sat down and painted today's picture.  While swearing.  And enjoying a lovely glug of gin.

Problem solved.

In a bid to stop resisting, I have a confession to make.  I enjoy the small things in life.  I enjoy being peaceful. Spending time in nature.  Being quiet.

And I also love being stubborn, feisty.  Having a good rant. Slurping gin.  And inventing new swear words that really roll round the tongue.

How about you?

Thank you and good night...

 

14 comments:

  1. Emma, I know EXACTLY what you mean!

    I try (oh how I try) to be calm, to be still, to remember to look at the sky, to take a deep breath, to enjoy the moment.

    But honestly, just sometimes, nothing feels better - or more natural - than a big slurp of gin and some colourful language!

    And when all said and done what could be better than laughing so hard that you snort! I can't think of anything.

    Well you have made me laugh out loud with this post, so now I'm off to find the gin and use some rude words....

    Big thanks for reminding me that sometimes, I don't have to be perfect to feel good!

    Have a great weekend. xx

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  2. I love a swear up. Sorry and all that but sometimes nothing quite works as well as a good old dose of profanity. I like your new word, worked it out immediately due to my intimate knowledge and liberal use of bad language!
    Enjoy your weekend.
    xx

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  3. Looove this Emma! Growing up with 4 brothers and being told I have the "Powe stubborn streak" by my mum constantly as she rolled her eyes, I too love the beautiful, the wise, the deep .. but then I feel like a cloak of restriction is surrounding me and I just want to break free, screaming, swearing and drinking like English bar wench :-) And you are so right. In this world of being open and understanding and 'there' for others, we forget to be real with ourselves and just let loose into our own truth of who WE are. Hurrah for your wise reminder, perfect :-) x

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  4. Looove this Emma! Growing up with 4 brothers and being told I have the "Powe stubborn streak" by my mum constantly as she rolled her eyes, I too love the beautiful, the wise, the deep .. but then I feel like a cloak of restriction is surrounding me and I just want to break free, screaming, swearing and drinking like English bar wench :-) And you are so right. In this world of being open and understanding and 'there' for others, we forget to be real with ourselves and just let loose into our own truth of who WE are. Hurrah for your wise reminder, perfect :-) x

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  5. I'm not one for gin but I do so love to swear!

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  6. hehe! I have always known you were a girl after my own heart. Thankyou for the snort inducing post, you are the shizzle :)xx

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  7. Fabulous post - i love having a good old rant. Im also totally stealing the word 'Funt' :o) Scarlett x

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  8. you are so a woman
    after my own heart:):):)
    laughing hard....I identify.
    isn't there something awfully
    war-like and brave and fierce
    about surrender?
    I think I'm starting to see that.
    That sometimes the most powerful
    thing we can do
    is to let go
    of fear
    and shoulds
    and impatience
    and. just. be.
    That this is actually an act
    of courage and defiance.
    That's where I'm landing on that.
    And I love to swear to...good for the soul.
    Sometimes nothing else will do:)
    love and grinning thanks,
    Jennifer
    (adore your art!)

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  9. Emma, I LOVED reading this post! I think we all experience everyday that what you resist persists and sometimes it's a hard pill to swallow! But balance is a wonderful thing too and you sound like you have it all together by recognising that you like 'losing' it sometimes! I relate. As much as I want to have a 'chronic inability to be jaded' it just feels good sometimes to be a little loud and unladylike about it all! Hope you are having a brilliant day and - make your happy loud! (just watched the new Matt Damon movie 'We bought a zoo')!

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  10. Emma, I LOVED reading this post! I think we all experience everyday that what you resist persists and sometimes it's a hard pill to swallow! But balance is a wonderful thing too and you sound like you have it all together by recognising that you like 'losing' it sometimes! I relate. As much as I want to have a 'chronic inability to be jaded' it just feels good sometimes to be a little loud and unladylike about it all! Hope you are having a brilliant day and - make your happy loud! (just watched the new Matt Damon movie 'We bought a zoo')!

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  11. Sounds perfectly sensible to me, thinking you might be secretly Australian though!! Funt is the kind of word we use, in fact I've heard it here and there.xx.

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  12. I love your exclamations like "cheeky bleeders" and "good gordon"! I had a 'meet the CFO' meeting at work and I feel so uncomfortable and other people are talking about their children. So I talked about an online class I took where I met bloggers from around the world including one who does beautiful art and says cheeky bleeders and good gordon. You helped me through a rough spot.

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  13. Cavorting with a bottle of gin? I think I'll join you!

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